March Wrap-up
Breaking down the idiocy and reviewing the stupidity that was March 2023 in Chicago.
The occasional wintery mix put a damper on Spring Training resulting in a lower lead connection average when compared to years past.
March 2023: 36 killed, 144 wounded
March 2022: 41 killed, 193 wounded
March 2021: 51 killed, 255 wounded
March 2020: 32 killed, 161 wounded
March 2019: 35 killed, 136 wounded
March 2018: 31 killed, 143 wounded
March 2017: 40 killed, 175 wounded
March 2016: 50 killed, 281 wounded
March 2015: 35 killed, 179 wounded
March 2014: 27 killed, 104 wounded
Avg March: 38 killed, 180 wounded
A breakdown of the month’s idiocy shows:
34 shot & killed
1 beaten
1 stabbed
4 death investigations
1 on duty CPD officer killed
1 shot by police, nonfatal
1 mass shooting (4 shot, 0 fatally)
4 homicide-linked arrests
A person shot every 4 hrs 11 mins
A homicide every 20 hrs 40 mins
11 homicide-free days
30 males killed vs 6 females
30 Blacks, 5 Hispanics, 1 White/Other
1 child 12 and younger shot, nonfatal
42 teenagers shot, 6 fatally
Homicide age range: 16-51
Team Austin led w/ 17 shot, 4 fatally
6th District led w/ 25 shot, 4 fatally
Expressway shootings: 0 shot, 0 fatal
14 grazed
2 selfies
7 #ShotInTheAss
1 useless Superintendent left town
We were looking for a March that would put up 45 homicides with an additional 150 shot and wounded. We came up way short on the homicide side of the ledger but nearly dead on with the wounded estimate. As for April, the rite of passage for Spring Training is the first all 70° weekend shitshow which almost always happens this month. Assuming that comes to pass, it’s likely we’ll see 50 homicides with an additional 225 shot and wounded.
March Clown City Updates 🤡
Now former police superintendent David Brown couldn’t get the hell out of here fast enough and high-tail it back to Dallas. No official goodbyes, no press conferences, not even a going away cake in the breakroom, nothing, just left. It was like he wasn’t even here to begin with.
He must have seen CWB’s tweet from a couple of weeks earlier and decided who the hell cares.
Speaking of unceremonious, the soon-to-be former mayor is taking her 3rd place finish with all the class one would expect for a classless individual. For someone who had instant hot takes on numerous non-Chicago-related issues over the years, she has said little since February 28th.
Official Lowlights
The CPD hasn’t officially posted all of March’s stupidity yet, but through March 26th we can clearly see those red-colored percentages mean crime is up. The CPD’s press release didn’t say much about that only to say that homicides are down (which is true) and that the homicide clearance rate is now 68%.
The CPD’s own data set says as of the time of this post there have 107 murders and only 21 have an arrest associated with them. Our math says that’s just 19.6% which means we’re short 48.5 percentage points worth of clearance rate coming from somewhere. Have a look if interested - https://data.cityofchicago.org/Public-Safety/Crimes-2001-to-Present/ijzp-q8t2/data
RIP Officer Vasquez-Lasso
The Trend Continues
Related: our dataset STILL has only two days of the Lightfoot era going shooting free, Nov 18, 2019, and Jan 7, 2020. With the annual warm-up on the way, it’s unlikely we’ll see a shooting-free day for the rest of her term.
All Dicks Must Come To An End
We'll miss Lori's panache for making statements that find their way onto our t-shirts and mugs. We’ll honor her third place finish by knocking off $5 on our second most popular tee of 2022.
If you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading. Our goal is to push out one long form post a week in addition to our regular stats focused posts. Thanks and remember “We don't want nobody nobody sent”.